Have you ever experienced that moment when your relationship is at its peak, and suddenly, your man starts to drift away? If you find yourself nodding in agreement or currently facing a similar situation, fear not! In this article, I will delve into the most common reasons why men distance themselves when they fall in love and offer valuable Reddit relationship advice on how to handle this delicate situation. Your attitude plays a pivotal role in shaping the future of your relationship, so let's dive in!
In this article, I will show you the most common reasons why a man leaves when he falls in love and what to do in this situation, since in most cases YOUR attitude is key to the future of the relationship.
First, you must be sure that your boy is really moving away, on many occasions we tend to exaggerate the situation and begin to create a series of mental stories without any basis.
Make sure that your boy does not find himself with an additional workload, has just started a new project or if he is going through a family problem, if only 2 days have passed without him calling, writing, or visiting you, stay relaxed, surely there is nothing to worry about.
On the contrary, if more than a week has passed and you know absolutely nothing about him, it is time to take action on the matter and find out what happened to your boy.
This situation usually occurs when the relationship is going "smooth sailing" that is, when you have already opened your heart, and stripped your mind and even your body with it.
At the same time, you perceive that he has more confidence in you, he looks at you in a special way, and both of them let their guard down and begin to believe that they are for each other.
That's when he just disappears, and you obviously panic, not knowing why or what to do.
Understanding Why Men Walk Away When They Fall in Love: Reddit Relationship Advice
The reasons can be infinite and describing each one would be crazy since each relationship is different, however, there are common factors that generalize the reasons that cause distancing in men:
Afraid of losing their freedom: Men may fear losing their independence as the relationship progresses. They might want to retain their personal space and time.
Afraid of commitment: Some men struggle with the idea of commitment. The prospect of a more serious, formalized relationship can be intimidating.
She thinks that he is not cut out for marriage and fears that their relationship soon needs to be formalized
Rushing into Things: If the relationship is moving too fast, he might feel the need to slow down and hit the brakes.
Emotional Overload: Intense emotions can be overwhelming, and your man might feel the need to take a break from the intensity.
Remember, these reasons are personal matters for him to deal with. You cannot directly fix or change them. However, your response can significantly impact the situation.
How to handle the situation - Reddit Relationship Advice:
Believe it or not, doing nothing is often the best course of action. As crazy as it sounds, giving him space is essential. Let him go if that's genuinely what he wants. Respect his decision and return the freedom he feels he lost. Men like to feel in control, and when they fall in love, it can trigger various fears and emotions.
Important Reddit Relationship Advice for Giving Him Space:
Avoid Revenge: Don't resort to ignoring him or playing games to gain his attention. Be normal in your responses, without any reproaches or complaints.
Show Independence: Remember how you were at the beginning of the relationship, with your social life, interests, and priorities. Show him that you are independent and happy with or without him.
Self-Reflection: While he's away, take the opportunity for self-reflection. Analyze your behaviors that might have made him feel he was losing his freedom. Work on positive changes within yourself.
Open Communication: Encourage open communication. Show him that you're willing to grow and improve as a person and that you expect the same from him.
You might think that the points on the list are different from each other, however, they have a common thread, and it is the fear that he shows toward their relationship.
The only thing you can do in this case is to do nothing, even if it seems crazy to you, it is the right thing to do.
Let him go if it is really what he wants to do, and give him back the freedom that he feels he lost, as a good man he likes to feel that he has the situation under control, but when he falls in love everything changes and many fears enter him.
eye! Giving him his space does not mean that you take an attitude of revenge, that is; If he writes or calls you on Wednesday, you won't answer him until Saturday, since you could turn the situation into a kind of game where the one who ignores the other the most wins.
Answer him normally, without reproaches or complaints. You don't have to answer the first ring of his call, let him ring a few times and let him know that you have things to do regardless of talking to him.
Remember how your relationship was at the beginning. Do you remember how you had a social life? You went out with your friends, you went to the movies, the theater, or the club, you went shopping, you attended dance or painting classes, your priorities were different, and that is the girl in whom he became interested.
Show him that you are independent and happy and that deep down you are still that same girl he fell in love with in the beginning.
Doing nothing is undoubtedly your best action, the probability that he will return in a short time and on his own foot is very high, however in this time of absence you should take the opportunity to make a real change within yourself.
Analyze what attitudes of yours caused him to feel that he was losing his freedom, identify them and change these details, because otherwise when he returns in a few days he will realize that you are still the same woman he left days ago.
Let him go out with his friends again, give each other a weekend off and see how for the following weekend he will not want to see you and everything will be as at the beginning.
Mistakes to Avoid?
If he stays distant, the worst thing you can do is start chasing him, calling him, writing him all the time, trying to find out what happened, if he is okay and you call non-stop with the justification that you "just" want to know if he is fine and safe, if an alien spaceship did not hijack him or if his dog did not devour him.
Peaceful! He is safe, remember that bad news flies, you would have already found out if he was not well.
It is typical that your mind begins to cloud with ideas that are of very little use such as: "If I don't call you and someone else takes the opportunity and tries to link you?"
It is clear that there is the possibility that in this time of absence, he begins to meet someone else, but there is also the possibility that someone else tries to link you to you, and that is something that he does not care about or at least decided to take the risk. and still, he walked away.
Give him his space, respect his decision, if you live chasing him with that insecurity, panic, and fear that floods your mind you are only going to make things worse, there is nothing more terrifying for a man than the fact of feeling harassed.
The three worst mistakes:
Try not to commit them please, because if you do, instead of bringing him closer to you, you will drive them further away.
Compassion:
Cause a feeling of pity in him, tell him how bad, sad devastated that makes you feel the fact that he is no longer as close as before, if he is a good man, he will immediately return to you and try to make things the same as days ago.
However, this will work only once, because when you have an argument or just time passes, he will realize that he is only with you out of compassion and no one chooses a partner out of charity.
Sooner or later, he will leave again and their relationship will be fractured forever.
Blame Game:
If you start judging him and declaring that he is the only culprit and that your relationship is in a probable crisis, without admitting your mistakes, you could make him feel bad and thereby cause him to return to your side.
Obviously, if you do this the pleasure will last very little, your man will feel manipulated by you, and he will feel that he is not with you by choice but only because of how bad you made him feel by his actions.
He will end up leaving just like the failed strategy of compassion.
Blackmail, Aggressiveness:
The classic mistake of trying to retain a man by threatening to take away something that he really loves, for example, if they have children, you blackmail him with the fact that you will allow him to see it.
He could agree to be with you for a few days or even a few more months, however here you not only affect your relationship but also your children.
Think twice before doing them, and do not allow anger or sadness to make you do or say things that you may regret tomorrow.
None of these strategies will work for you, you will only make him feel happy to have left, he will stop seeing you as the ideal woman and he will see you only as the girl who tried to manipulate him and could not.
How to Rekindle the Connection – Reddit Relationship Advice :
Now that you've given him space and focused on personal growth, it's time to rekindle the connection between the two of you:
Stay True to Yourself: While you may make positive changes in yourself, never compromise your authenticity. Stay true to who you are.
Plan Quality Time: Once he's ready to reconnect, plan quality time together. Create new memories and share experiences that will reignite the spark.
Be Supportive: Show him your unwavering support in his goals and endeavors. Being his cheerleader will strengthen your bond.
Talk and Listen: Engage in open, honest communication. Share your feelings, fears, and desires, and encourage him to do the same.
Although it is not your intention to manipulate him, it is the way in which he interprets your tireless fight to stay with him.
Remember that there are no tricks or secret potions to hold a man against his will, do not lose your dignity in the name of love, do not trample on your self-esteem causing him pain or begging him to stay.
The only thing that will keep a man by your side is to be yourself, free and without fear of losing him.
A man can walk away for many reasons, but if you give your guy the freedom he needs and show him how independent you are, very few things can take him away from you.
Give him the confidence so that he tells you when something in the relationship bothers him, show him that you are willing to renew and improve as a person, as long as the changes are positive, and ensure that this feeling is reciprocal and he has the willingness to improve as a couple.
Relationships are complex, and men may distance themselves for various reasons. However, the key to maintaining a lasting connection is to be authentic and free, respecting each other's individuality. Avoid resorting to manipulative tactics and focus on nurturing a healthy, open relationship. Give him the freedom he needs while showing your support and understanding. By doing so, you'll increase the likelihood of rekindling your love and building a stronger bond.
Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments. How has this Reddit relationship advice helped you in handling similar situations?